Zim Digital Sunday Express
June 22, 2021

Power Of Growth Part 3: Building bridges, to build better relationships

Our mindsets are so malleable, each day we awake we get the opportunity to choose how we will use the 35 000 choices at our disposal

By Lorraine Morris

“If you are facing a new challenge or being asked to do something that you have never done before don’t be afraid to step out. You have more capability than you think you do but you will never see it unless you place a demand on yourself for more”. – Joyce Meyer

Welcome this week to the latest instalment of The Power of Growth, and I hope that you are picking up something from my new column in The Sunday Express, which is finding free expression in this newspaper.

I mentioned last week that there is just so much more to this topic of growth mindset, each day that we open our eyes gives us an opportunity to see things around as opportunities or threats.

Over the past few weeks, I have been doing a lot of research and work on Building Relationships.

John Maxwell says “Relationships become better when we tear down the walls that divide us and build
bridges that bring us together”.

This is such a profound statement because what I have found is that what builds or breaks relationships be it work, family, spiritual, romantic or friendships is in actual fact linked to one’s mindset.

Where a person tends to have fixed mindset tendencies, they may view some relationships as “meant to be”, draining or they may resent the other person long after a disagreement.

They may find joy in the hardships of another because it may mean that they seem to be doing way better than the other person.

There is also a tendency for them to put very minimal effort to improving the relationship even within the workplace, they may make use of the blamegame often and believe that revenge is sweet.

You may have heard them use some of these phrases, “nhingi handizwisise”, “anemusoro wakaoma”, “hataurike naye”.


No two brains are the same, common sense is not always common

It goes further: “We are not aligned”, “I am not going to try any longer”, “I am the boss”, “I am the parent” etc, some of these phrases are used because they see a challenge as a threat and don’t want to hear another person’s view.

Now here’s a quick insight to the brain, no two brains are the same, common sense is not always common so we shouldn’t write someone off based on the fact that they couldn’t guess what you were thinking.

It is not about what it is that you liked or didn’t or how you like your morning coffee if you have not shown them how to make it before.

On the other side, when a person has growth mindset tendencies, they believe that in any relationship there will be challenges and opportunities to build bridges and not create walls.

They believe that building relationships does take effort to build and to maintain but they remain committed to the journey and to improving levels of communication.

You may also find that such persons tend to request for feedback, they tend to inspire others and encourage you even when things seem dim and gloomy.

They are willing to give the benefit of the doubt and will try and try again if at first, they do not succeed.

They don’t give up on relationships that easily but go the extra mile even if at times they get burnt a couple of times in the process.

Our mindsets are so malleable, each day we awake we get the opportunity to choose how we will use the 35 000 choices at our disposal, we get to challenge our biases which keep us fixed in terms of how we view certain relationships.

Today the challenge for you my fellow Zimbabweans is for you to zoom into the different types of relationships in your life and decide which mindset will you use to improve that or those relationships.

A tip and a reminder, you are a work in progress, you are not perfect for no one is perfect, and so the goal is not to be perfect but to build bridges not walls, to improve and become better.

As Joyce Meyer said “You have more capability than you think you do but you will never see it unless you place a demand on yourself for more”.

Till next week….remember you can change only if you want to.

Lorraine Morris is co-founder Musikana Foundation – musikanafoundation@gmail.com Instagram @musikanafoundation. Revive and Thrive Hub – info@reviveandhtrivehub.com Instagram @reviveandthrive_summits

 


 

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